Boy, Was I Wrong

Ya know for years I have had very little sympathy for people with weak stomachs. I don't have one and I think alot of people can internalize issues into a puke. It seems that there are the pukey people and the who seldom if ever puke such as myself. I always thought it was because of the lack of will or a good variety of foods, etc. I don't know. In some girls I've met through the years it almost seemed like an attention thing, a drama scene, "I feel sick." Puh-leaze. Toughen up. I used to think that. I still think that is true for some people and for some age brackets.

I think I later applied alot of this to queasy pregnant women. Like they just knew for some reason that they were supposed to have icky stomachs while pregnant and then had to continually voice it during their pregnancy for attention, sympathy, and babying. I still think that's the case for some pregnant women. It has to be all about them and if they seem totally fine then they just want people to know about the terrible nausea that they have going on for attention. I think there are some girls that I've met that are picky eaters or that don't eat regularly enough that have more nausea issues for those exact reasons, pregnant or not. I still believe that. One of my old bosses when I was much younger got pregnant. She was a vegetarian but only ate dairy and starches most of the time. She was a smoker too. She drank all kinds of diet pop. She was always sick and weak with her pregnancy. Oh, and she seldom took her prenatals because, 'they made her feel bad?' Her doctor told her that she was terribly deficient and that she HAD to eat meat if she refused to compensate for all the other foods that she was lacking, smoking while pregnant, and not taking her prenatals. It was just so pathetic. How selfish. She too was sick all the time with nausea. So as I got older and was constantly in contact through the years with a variety of pregnant women whether related, friends, or coworkers.

Don't get me wrong, I do believe that there are people that despite every effort are just wired that way, whether pregnant or not. That really sucks. I know of 2 people that were so ill during their pregnancies it almost cost them their babies. That must be horrible. I cannot imagine what that must be like. My first pregnancy with Little Buddy was actually very nice, at least until the very end when it was really quite miserable. I was starving all the time. I ate everything whenever I wanted it. I was happy, laughing all the time (to the point of tears and wet pants) with intermittent crying spurts. I was smooth, shiny, and slept like a rock. I only felt a little queasy once or twice and it was mainly because of the heightened sense of smell that made my stomach turn, but I never once threw up my entire pregnancy til after birth in the hospital room. My biggest complaint was lots of heartburn and TUMS was my best friend.

Anyway, this pregnancy has not been as pleasant. I feel queasy all the time. Some days are worse than others. Some times I eat fruit and feel yucky, sometimes I eat soup and want to hurl, another day I had loads of green beans and scallops and felt like a million bucks. It is soooo weird. I rarely feel all excited about food, and if you know me at all, this is just NOT me at all. I am very much a foodie. I love food, all kinds. I eat pretty healthy but do love my sweets and a good filet, seafood, etc. Now, nothing sounds very good. Then if it does, we go to get it or make it at home and then I feel all grossed out smelling it or seeing it and can hardly eat it. OR if I get all fired up and it looks delicious, it really is never quite as delicious as food normally is for me. Then, if I do eat something that I was dying for and enjoyed while eating. Shortly after eating, I feel all nauseous and bloaty for the next 2-3 hours. This sucks! This must be what those poor women must feel like with all the nausea. While I never actually puke, I often feel that if I did I might just feel better? So my apologies for all the women that were really ill and I thought to myself were being sissies. This does not apply to the 2 women that I know who were terribly ill during their pregnancies at all, just many others. I am not a puker and can go years and years in between puking. It is really a gift I feel. Then suddenly I do and I feel so glad because I know that I will again have many pukeless years ahead of me.

Last night hubby asked me to pick up some grillables and fixins at the grocery store. By mid shopping trip I just felt grossed out by the meat and other foods and exhausted. I felt that I had to force myself to eat dinner . . . . . . EVEN DESSERT????? Never before in my life have I ever had to force myself to eat dessert being my favorite part of life. Well, unless it was lemon bars or something else that I really don't like such as a citrus dessert or dark chocolate with fruit themed dessert or something like that and the baker was going to be truly crushed if I said, "no thanks."

Yes, with this pregnancy I have nausea (without vomiting, so far), headaches, dizziness, hot flashes, tinnitus, complete and utter exhaustion, achiness all over, no energy, restlessness (during nap time or bed time), zits ALL OVER?, wirey hair?, cold one minute and hot the next, oh, and I stink? Not sure what that's all about but it's gross and I cannot stand how I smell. Sorry for so many gross details but I figure we have several moms here and a nurse who read regularly who can most likely relate or understand much of this in some capacity? Hopefully? Anyway, I also feel blue. So weird. I wanted to have another baby so bad and am very happy about this pregnancy but I feel blue, almost postpartum-like. Mealtime rolls around and NOTHING sounds good at all. Then if my husband offers to go and pick something special up for me he brings it back and one look or smell and I feel like I am back at square one. This is so very frustrating for me because I am not a wussy, picky person. I am a mom on the move always up for doing whatever. Loving to play with my Little Buddy all the time and eat and have fun. This whole thing going on with this pregnancy is really driving me nuts cause I just want to sit or lay down and relax. Oh, and to top it off I have had 3 illnesses since conception so I cannot take anything but Tylenol, which I am allergic to. Blagh! Sorry for the pity party, but this is my life right now and I just wanted to air my dirty laundry. Don't want pity just floored by how vastly different this pregnancy is from my first. Betting it's a girl with every ounce of my soul. Yep!

*Ee gads, if this diagram is correct, then I could have 6 more weeks of this queasiness? Tomorrow is only week 10. Oy!!!!!